reflection

September 30 is always a hard day for me.

It is a day of quiet reflection. A day to remember. A day to ponder on how the Lord has blessed and guided my family.

10 years ago we were expecting our first daughter. I was 38 weeks pregnant and had no complications during my pregnancy. I went into labor. We got to the hospital and were nervous but excited to be receiving another sweet baby into our family. It was there that we received the worst news. They couldn't find her heart beat. It felt like the air had been sucked out of my lungs. To say the least, we were heartbroken. We delivered our sweet little Lucie. Her body was perfect. She was perfect. There was a tiny hole in her umbilical cord. We left the hospital with empty arms and empty hearts. 

Those feelings of emptiness were quickly replaced by overwhelming feelings of love and gratitude that were poured upon us from our Heavenly Father. I began to see the tiny little tender mercies that the Lord had given to our grieving family. I felt the reality of the plan of salvation and gained a solid reaffirmation that death does not end at the grave. Our family were the recipients of hundreds of acts of kindness- we were witnesses of so many kind hearted people who were keeping their covenants to bear one another's burdens and to strengthen those who need to be strengthened.  We were not left alone to grieve. Heavenly Father sent angels,  both earthly and heavenly to bear us up during our heartbreaking time.

I look back at that time 10 years ago and can still feel the comfort we received from our Heavenly Father. 

I know that we will see our sweet baby again. I know that she is, and will continue to be part of our Heavenly Family. I know that it is our Savior who provided the means for my family to be joined together in the eternities. I love Him. The gratitude I feel for His sacrifice is overwhelming. My heart has a hole in it that cannot be filled. But, because of the love of a wise and kind Heavenly Father, we will be together as a family. I can still feel peace even through heartbreaking tragedy. I look forward to the day when our family will be whole. When I can hold Lucie  in my arms and know that we are a forever family.

NEW YORK CITY

The stars aligned and we were able to meet some friends of ours, KIDLESS, in the beautiful city of 

New York.

we headed out tuesday night and picked them up from the airport.

Wednesday- C and our friend got to go onto the floor of the New York Stock Exchange. Not so common anymore. They said it was awesome. While they were there, my friend and I shopped til we dropped-times square, all over. So fun to have some much needed girl time with a great friend. 

We met up with the boys and got some okay noodles (corey loved them) for lunch then headed to Newsies. My friend really wanted to see it and she was not disappointed.

self portrait outside of newsies.

thursday-

World Trade Center Memorial and then to see Lady Liberty. 

I love going there. She is so beautiful.

for dinner we went to a good pizza place with nice thin crust pizza. tasty. my mouth is still watering.

the boys did a little shopping and our friend bought a shirt for corey- he swears by them- we brought it home and THEN tried it on... slightly too small, had to do an exchange.

tried to go to natural history museum, but it closed 10 minutes before we got there....

friday- natural history museum, rented bikes and the met

wow! i was impressed.

we were walking through the natural history museum and we saw this;

it was beautiful. it honestly brought tears to my eyes. i was so sad G wasn't there- this is his favorite painting. it was amazing to see it in person. there is so much paint you can actually see the brush strokes. it was breathtaking. we went back and looked at it again before we left.

we rented bikes- which is one of my favorite things to do in NYC- got yelled at by some firefighters, took our lives into our own hands, weaved in and out of cars  and ate some indian food. tasty. then we realized we were close to a really good cheesecake shop; we stopped for a bite. equally as good.

while we were at the met- we came across these painting.

this is J's favorite.

it was amazing to see so many famous paintings in one place. i loved being here.

we ate dinner at lombardi's pizza- the first pizza place in america. let me say- i thought it might be hyped, but the pizza was SOOOOO good. 

we stopped at levain bakery and got some delicious cookies.

went back, played some racko, shopped at a huge TJ MAXX, boys bought bow ties- they looked quite dapper.

Saturday- temple 

We ended our last day with a visit to the temple. i loved going here. it's so nice to be there, with my husband and to feel the peace there. such a contrast to the noisy streets outside.

afterward we grabbed some mexican food and then stopped at magnolia bakery. 

we said good bye to our friends as our subways both approached. it was such a great trip and so fun to be with them. we both left a little misty eyed.

hopefully we can do this again- soon!

funny september

this month has flown by. i don't know if i'm the only who feels like it. it has been a whirlwind of starting school, getting into schedules and routines, gymnastics, scouts, piano, work, a little bit of everything. in the midst of this i also celebrated a birthday. 30 something ;) it was on a sunday,  so we went out to dinner a few nights before, at a restaurant in  town and took C with us.

she tried to entertain herself with the pone (phone). she was taking all sorts of pics of herself.

 she wanted one of both of us. 

i obliged. she was holding the camera down, so i peeked over the top.

eventful birthday dinner.

i refer to this birthday year as the year of the gray.

really? already? tons of gray hair.

not happy about it.

what's a girl to do?

 start coloring my hair EVERY 6 weeks. woah-that's a big time commitment- or just let it grow. 

maybe as i get older i'll get some inspiration about how to solve this problem.

you know what they say... one year older and wiser too.

my great hubby made me breakfast sunday morning. i had made a big pot of soup the day before, so we ate that for dinner, but he did make me the apple cake that i love-from scratch. i think i've had it nearly every year since high school. it's delicious. it's a perfect fall treat.

he also got me a pot. yup folks, a pot. i was dyiing for it. he said no, he wouldn't get me a pot for my birthday. i reassured him i really wanted it and i would never buy it for myself because they are expensive. i can't wait to use it on a fall day.

he also got me a couple workout jackets. they are perfect for this leaf changing weather.

thanks for a great birthday

gettysburg

a few saturdays ago, C got to go on a 12 mile hike with K and his scout troop through gettysburg.

He said it was neat to see it up close.

They saw places where bullets and cannonballs were still lodged into the buildings.

I love Gettysburg, but a 12 mile hike isn't what 4 small kids need. 

Glad they had a great time 

 pretending to be asleep

enjoying

we have been enjoying fall. 

loving the cooler weather (minus the last few days that was around 95!)

We had s'mores at a friends house one night. 

yummy.

 i love these outfits of the girls we picked up at costco this summer-

enjoying them before summer is gone

 look at this beautiful landscape. 

the colors are amazing.

 since the older kids have gone back to school, i feel like i am going double time trying to keep up with the two smalls lately.

they added extra accessories to the fish tank, stuck coins into the piano breaking two keys, got soaking wet in the hose,  squirted soap into sinks, got kitchen all wet... it has been exhausting. 

i'm hoping things slow down in a bit when we are all adjusted.

i love my two mischief makers.

buffalo gals wont you come out tonight...

as i said before, we went to buffalo.

these sweet friends of mine were there.

oh how i miss them.

they were my 5k running buddies, girl night out friends, lunch dates, birthday get togethers. 

they were our family in ny.

it was sooooo great to see them.

the real reason for our visit to buffalo was to see our great friends be sealed to their baby they adopted 

6 1/2 months  ago.

she's the one with the head band on.

yes, they have two babies.

and YES, God still continues to manifest His hand through miracles.

the sealing was so sweet. 

both of those babies are so special.

each of their stories are amazing.

so glad we got to be part of this.

upstate new york

for labor day, we headed back to our old stomping ground. 

we visited palmyra.

it had been a while since we had been there. 

 we took the kids to the sacred grove

 i love it this time of year.

it is so green and beautiful.

 by weird happenstance, we randomly stumbled on some of friends who live in pa. 

we all had a nice walk through the sacred grove

 until we met up with this rowdy bunch of boys who had found sticks and were sword fighting.

i bet joseph smith did that once or twice ;)

a little more

watching kiddos walk away

 after school, we whisked the kids away to gymnastics.

ate dinner at a fun little farm, and stopped at one of the most delicious ice cream stands this side of the susquehanna.

 b was really miss his brother while he was at school.

he picked up the picture and was carrying it around saying, i miss him....

 how J's room looked when asked to clean it.

this was under baby C's bed.

first day of school

how i have dreaded this day.

back to crazy routine.

running kids around.

waking peacefully sleeping kids from naps.

homework.

schedules.

packing lunches.

but, i realize all good things must come to an end.

and so, here is it. much to my dismay.

first day of school.

i am really excited for the kids. i love that they get to learn, be around friends their age and make their own choices.

K was SO nervous this year to start middle school.

not gonna lie, i started tearing up as i dropped him off. i wasn't expecting it. as i pulled away, i had tears running down my cheeks. he was so nervous and didn't know what to expect. 

i worried all day.

when he got home, i asked,' how was school?' he replied, 'awesome. i get some time between classes, my own locker....' YEAH! so glad.

 G is a different story. 

i dont' know if he will ever LOVE school. he's super smart and a great student. i just don't think he loves people telling him to do stuff ALL day long. i keep encouraging him to have a positive attitude. he did great though.

 J did great. 

not worried. no hesitation. 

she just kinda rolls with the punches.

 she had a great day.

 b found a welcome home flower for G.

both were so excited to be reunited.